I'm trying to let go of you

I want to erase every memory that I have of you - your smile, your voice, your touch, the feel of your heart beating against mine

But it's just too hard

Because even when the mind tries to forget
The heart and soul remembers

Do you know what it's like?
To be left lying on the floor?
Do you know how bad it hurts?
To feel blood flowing like a river
Do you know what you did to me?
When you left me to die alone

I breathed my last breath with the whisper of your name on my lips
I love you - always had, always will

Ten feet underwater
And I'm drowning
Can't find my way back to the surface
There's fire burning in my lungs
But it's the loneliness that hurts me the most

There's no light at the end of the tunnel
Only an endless darkness
That threatens to rip me apart
Smother me, paralyse me
And tear me away from everything that I hold dear
I'm scared, and I need someone to hold me
Tell me that everything's gonna be okay
Save me from the terror that keeps me rooted to the ground
I can't escape

My heart is beating
My pulse is racing
And blood is flowing
It hurts, everytime

So WHY can't I stop?

Somebody, please help me
I don't think I can go on anymore
For if this is living,
Then I think I'm better off dead

I've done a pretty good job so far, haven't I?
My smiling face, my mask of lies
No one's seen through them yet
No one knows
And just for this matter, I'll give myself a little pride

Nobody knows
I starved myself for days on end
You thought it was just a diet, didn't you?

Nobody hears
I binged on and on
Threw up sick, all over the toilet floor
I blasted my music - loud and proud
You never knew, did you?

Nobody sees
When I lose myself
That slash across the wrist
The thrill and the high, the joy of the ride
You'll never guess that it burns, don't you?

I wish that those stories, they were true
The ones where mummies and daddies know, by instinct - everything
The ones where best friends can sense when something's wrong
The ones where the knight in shining armour saves you

But these stories, they're just made to disappoint aren't they?
Because mummies and daddies, they're never perfect
And best friends, they stab you - not in the back, but in the heart - where it hurts the most
And as for that knight in shining armour?
He can slay dragons, monsters, and every other horror
But can he save me from myself?

And I think I finally understood what love is
Love is like when you want that person to shine like the brightest star
Even if it means you lose your own light
Love is like when you urge that person to do something they don't want to, just so they don't make your own mistakes
Even is it means you end up being hated

But I think, most of all:
Love is like when you start to grow apart
Deliberately distance yourself
From everything and everyone you hold dear
Just so you hope it'll ease the pain for them
When you leave forever

She used to be so happy
Vibrant smile on her face
The melody of her voice
Spring in her step
And she was always at peace with herself

In a heartbeat everything changes
She's always alone now
Even in the most crowded and busiest of places
She watches from the darkest corners
She blasts her stereo loud
So no one can hear the sound of her heart breaking when she cries
She wraps her arms around herself
Tries to hold her broken body together

She hurts, everytime
It kills her just to think about it
She wants to let go right now
Escape to a faraway place
Her eyes are cold and glassy

What happened to her?
Who is she?
I don't think I know her anymore
Somebody help her, please - the girl in the mirror
Help - I think she's me